Bourne's BIG Trip: Swamp Tour and Cafe Dumont: Dad's 60th Birthday

Happy Birthday Cousin Bryan!!! Hope you have a good birthday today! You're very smart and kind! I liked talking to you in Washington D.C. that one time when we went to the Albert Einstein Monument. HAVE A GREAT DAY!!!

(I began to write this on yesterday, his actual birthday, but now have finished it on today.)

This blog post talks about the events that took place on January 25th, 2012, my Dad's 60th birthday:

I stared at the concrete, on the corner of the office, with both of my dogs on either side, with leashes on them. They were sniffing around. I breathed in and breathed out, tired. Earlier in the morning Mom and I had taken the dogs out, after telling Dad happy birthday and not letting him take the dogs out, it was us two. Mom had gone inside the office, to ask some questions and get a tour brochure. And I, bored, went running with the pups, to get a little exercise. Up the street on the right side of the office and then back. It was a run, like I said, and I was poofed out for a while, as were the dogs. I stared down at the concrete, and Mom came out and looked left for me. I got up and said hello to her. We thought about presents to get Dad, as we went down the way and I saw that Encounter, and told her about Matthew being there. Then something clicked. I instantly remembered that the first day we got there I got a ball back by the laundry room by a guy named Matthew. It was all connected! So I saw him before the Mint! It was kind of cool. We saw some other dogs we steered clear of, cutting back to our R.V. lot. Then we took the dogs inside. Dad was watching T.V., and I scratched his back, and told him I loved him a lot.

Dad had a few ideas for his birthday, but he didn't want to do anything really exciting, as he just wanted to rest after all those busy days. Rebecca and I both wanted to go on the swamp tour, and so he complied to that. I told him since it was his birthday he could pick, but he said he wanted to go on the swamp tour also, and see some alligators. Mom said that Mrs. Deedee, mother of our friends Weston and Elise, wanted us to go to Cafe Dumond. So even though Dad had his personal interests, it was kind of an everybody else day, sorry to say. But he was fine with doing those things anyway, so it kind of worked out for everybody. Rebecca was also wanting to go on a carriage tour. I felt bad for Dad, everybody wanting to do something. I wanted to get him a really cool present, but for the past few days I had seen nothing that tooted my horn. Oh well. So I was determined to find something today. Back with that Cajun girl, who pointed to us the tour guide and that we could go on a carriage boat or air boat. Rebecca picked the air boat. So we got in the jeep and punched in the address on our GPS, getting in the car. We got back on that bridge, and I thought that I HAD to read an uplifting children's book, for the last book I read had been totally dark and thrilling, and so I needed a break, a totally bright and jolly kids book. Why is is that teen literature has to be so dark and menacing?

On the bridge, I picked just the book for that. I had read the Wonderful Wizard of Oz and The Scarecrow of Oz and they were both delightful and up beat, and not too kiddy. On iBooks was Tin Woodman of Oz and it was Free, so I purchased it. I would read it on my phone for the way there and back. Frank L. Baum, the writer of all these wonderful Oz books that would later become movies, and he wrote 14 of them. I have read 3. That remains 11. I shall read them in order from now on, but I haven't so far, except the Wonderful Wizard of Oz, which is the first one. Anyway, I started reading it as we went along the road, away from New Orleans, in the jeep. For the next thirty minutes, we came into the boondocks of lower Louisiana, with all the forests and shabby houses, with all the tractors and junk all around, the shacks with the wood coming off of it, and the dogs barking. A few suburban areas, but not many, as we came into an area with many trees and a few openings of the swamp, here and there, as I read of Woot the Wanderer coming to Tin Woodman's court, and how they decide to seek out the Tin Man's true love, Nimmee Amee. It's a very complicated story, and the blog isn't about Oz books, it's about the adventures of our family!

Then we came upon it, a large patch of asphalt with a building to our right, a street, and a parking lot to our left and right in front of that building, a house further down, with trees around and a lake, it seemed, to our left, and some boats and a dock. We parked in front of this, with the docks overcasting boats, mostly air boats, which is a little boat and big blue circular fan thing behind the boat, turning round and round, making air. We were going to get the tickets at that building, plus look around, and go to the restroom. Turning my phone off, I got out of the car and stretched. I then walked toward the office. It had a shady roof over the porch, with old wooden columns, and there was a window opening and a lady there, with snacks and stuff. We walked over there, and Mom was the last, and Dad got the tickets and I looked among some souvenirs positioned on the porch, and they were pretty bad. Not too many good ones. No books, just little statues. After Dad got the tours for the boats, I looked to my far right, at a restroom. I went up a step, in there, and saw white walls and pictures of animals I looked a little at before washing my hands and getting out.

As I got out, I looked to my right at a large cage with water in it, and behind that was some mound and a doggie door, then some equipment. I saw it. Upon closer inspection, I saw what it was. An alligator. Not very big, in the water, feet and hands spread out. I wanted to spook it, but I thought about that, even caged, who wants to spook a gator. So I didn't. It said not to put your hand in. That, I would not do, not in a million years. Then we got some water bottles and snacks, Rebecca getting oreos and Doritos, and me pretzels. Luckily, I am the best rationer in the state of Georgia, and can ration food so that it takes me the whole time to eat it over a one hour and forty five minute ride. Oh yeah. It's possible.

Then, after getting our snacks and going to the car, we got ready to leave, and waited and read and I did a few chapters before there was 10 minutes left 'til the guide was going to take us on a tour. I had a bandanna and Indiana Jones hat on, because I wanted to look like Jones and I thought it would be cool. I would continue for a long time to have this costume on. I put the pretzels in my blue jacket pocket, and the pocket knife (if we should get stranded) in my back pocket, and my phone, that had no holster yet, so I put it in Mom's purse as we got up out of the car and came out by a picnic table that was in front of the dock and boats. We wondered which one was going to be ours. They all had little seats and then a step up was two seats and a lever that went back and forth. It was a speed boat. I was excited. There was also headphones, and I wondered what those were for. Big puffy ones. Then, two other people came, one black haired with facial hair and then the other one who was blonde haired, pony tail. Ok so another man, white haired, skinny, 60's maybe, also came around, with a camera and hat. Then our guide, in a big jacket, bald with sun glasses, said hello and said that his name was Justin, that this was a cool tour and was the LA Airboat Tours. He went over some obvious rules, that no pregnant women or people with back problems should come on. Also it was gonna be really fast, and to have all your parts in the boat at all times and to take as many pictures as we wanted.

He told us he was going to take the ropes off, and that one person could sit up there with him. Dad volunteered for that, as it was his birthday. No life jackets, just seat belts and the headphones, which were to block off the sound. I was on the right side, Rebecca in the middle, and Mom on the left side, with the old man on the right in front of me, and the couple to the left of him, and the blonde haired lady in the middle, and it's obvious where the man was. Justin asked everyone where they were from. He had a kind of Cajun accent, but more New Jersey, even though he would later tell us he was born, raised, and lived in the bayou. That's pretty incredible. Well, he said until we were out of the bay with all the docks we would be pretty fast, and then out of it we would slow down. Justin said that maybe we would be lucky enough to see an alligator. I got to worrying. It wasn't guaranteed? Would this adventure be shortened? I hoped we would see the reptile scum. He said hopefully a lot. So, the motor started up after he had put the ropes inside, and then everyone was seated. Dad had many advantages in the shotgun seat, talking right by the guide, and higher than everyone else so he saw everything. The motor started up, and another guy kicked us off as we then rode off. The Swamp Tour... had begun.

Along the bay, were houses, right by the shore, and more sheds and tractors, boats and docks. We got out, with trees on either side and water spraying. I thought to myself, "This is fast. I've been faster on a horse." Little did I know what was to come. We sped out like lightning, our front end going fast as everyone put their headphones on. I already had mine fastened over my hat, and it was tucked way down, as Justin said that once a hat came off he couldn't get it, and to be careful and secure it. I was ready to see some alligators. On the way over, I thought about Indiana Jones and making a story about a kid adoring him, and that kid going on an adventure in a swamp. I thought it would make a good survival book. But at the same time, I had had a lot of ideas flowing through my head in those days, and I don't know if any of them will actually become something. Maybe. Well we came out among many trees on the water, and marshland sticking up out of the ground, like prarie land with water around it. There were some dead trees in the water, horizontally, some branches sticking out. Justin stopped the boat, and said, "There you can see two alligators on the branch, over there." It was on my side, and I looked at it with open eyes. An alligator sat atop a branch, his body spread over it. He dashed into the water. Snap. Snap. Snap. Pictures taken.

I was so amazed, it was so cool to see that! I wished to see more of this, as I slowly ate some pretzels and then twisted the top around and made it secure in my hand. Two sips of water. Rationing. Tis an art. The wind was in my face as we rode along like the wind, sipping, eating a little, and then occasionally stopping to spot a few gators in the water or around, and most, fortunately, were on my side. Dad asked some questions to Justin, as I nudged Rebecca when I saw something, and she used her phone sometimes. Mom used her small camera also. We stopped in front of a marshland, and then I saw it, as we passed in front of it. it again on my side. It was maybe the biggest gator I'd ever seen so far on the tour, maybe. He was like at least 6 0r 7 feet long, and he had his eyes focused on us. I then had the idea to make the adventure book about them going into a swamp and it breaking down, and I daydreamed about it for the rest of the time, thinking from time to time, and asking questions of Justin to get material for it. I asked him about hunting, how you get stuck in the quick quick quicksand, and how you have to have like a staff to pull yourself up, and we saw a few birds, one of which Justin said he ate, and it was actually pretty good. I tried to imagine myself eating it, as I had eaten other things, like frogs and caviar. Gross.

Even though I was asking question, giddy and daydreaming about my book, and looking around a little, my eyes occasionally darted back to the gator, it's tail coming around it's body, it's mouth not open, but it could be open. Justin asked where everyone was from, and the couple said that they were from San Diego. Justin joked, "You know the alligators always go for the CA people." The old man remarked he was from New Hampshire, and we told Justin our roots. I asked him about the Rougarou, , and he said it was the BigFoot of Louisiana. I could incorporate that in my story too. I got to thinking about it a little more often then not, as Justin told us of all the foxes, cranes(as we saw the graceful creature behind the alligator, doings it's daily exercises) and different kinds of birds, plus the fish and reptiles. He told us that it was tone down season for the gators in the winter, that they are fine with each other, and don't eat much, and we passed a few little ones that were on top of each other. I asked him if gators did the bird eats food off of teeth thing, and he said that they don't, and said the number one difference between crocodiles and alligators was that gators were gray and smaller.

We then got out of the open wide marshland we had previously been in before, with the masses of tall grass sticking up, yellow and green, with blue water around, and then came to a slow as we approached the real swamp, the sickly trees on either side, with the moss hanging down, and all the dark and light green colors, all thick and everything, and we went through it. This was the object of so many movies, and I had dreamed about coming here while being in New Orleans. I thought about the story, and alligators chasing them, as I ate a few pretzels and drank some water. I had now seen now 6 alligators, counting the one in the cage I had seen. So I had seen real living alligators, not caged, in their natural environments. The CA people asked Justin if a gator had ever been in the boat. "Three times," he said as he turned the boat a little. "They like to eat people from California." The people uneasily laughed, and I ate another pretzel. I had seen alligators in zoos before, and in Orlando, FL, at a Gator Farm, but never out in the open like this. I will later incorporate this into my story. I thought about some things as we drifted around in the swamp, seeing another boat, from a different company. Mom asked him about who owned this land, and he said private owners, that there was a lot of Natural Gas place there, and that the company he works for signed a contract saying they could take tours there. The New Hampshire Man asked about the Posted signs on the trees. "It's a nice way of saying no Trespassing."

Then we came into Marshland again, and an hour had already passed. I had only a few pretzels and water left, but didn't eat for a while. We came to all these cypress trees, and they were actually in the water. I was amazed at this eerie look, with the mucky water and the dark feel. We stopped at one point, by a little marsh island, and I asked Justin what you would need to survive. He said a cell phone. I asked if you didn't have one what would you use, and he said that a first aid kit, a little bit of food and something to defend yourself with would suffice, if you had to get off, and that he knew the area so well we could be fine in it. I was a little disappointed, for this would make my book's plot too easy. I needed something harder, so I think I'll add some bad guys too. He then pointed right to the side of the boat, Justin did this. There was an alligator right by the left side of the boat, it's head bobbing up on the surface, it's devil-like eyes taking us in. Everyone was really surprised, and tried to get away from the side of the boat, cameras snapping and phones taking pictures also. Justin said that this was Bob, who is always in this area and always, "bobs" up, hence the name given. He told us a few things before he did something that nobody, nobody expected.

It started like this: Justin jumped down, put the boat in neutral(I never knew you could do such a thing) and took the top off a cooler in the back by the big air motor. He was talking about nothing in particular while doing this, as he then came back down the aisle. In his hands, was a baby alligator, barely bigger than my wrist to my elbow, that he held around the neck with his thumb and pointer finger, and had his hands around the tail too. I was flabbergasted. In his hands he was holding a small gator; I mean, you don't see that every day! Wait, you do? Oh, you're a gator owner. Huh. I didn't think I would ever meet a person who saw alligators every day. Huh. But anyway, most of you (excluding this smart alack who "always sees them") haven't seen them all the time, or as much as seen a person handling it. Justin explained that this was Bob Jr, that they caught him, and will keep him until he's older, because he doesn't stand much a chance out here alone, because Bob Sr. would eat him in Mating Season, and they caught him three weeks ago. He asked if anyone wanted to hold him or touch him, and to hold him tightly (but not too tightly) around his neck, and holding the tail tight. The couple were a little uneasy, but as you don't do this every day, they petted it and took hold of it, saying it was surprisingly very soft. Now, you probably know me enough to know I love to try new things, and that I probably wouldn't get the opportunity to do this ever again. Rebecca and I got our phones, and my parents got their cameras ready, as I said, "I'll hold it."

The lady handed it over, quite happy to get it off of her after a while. Justin held it as I prepared to hold a real live alligator. Was I scared? Yes, more scared than you can fathom! But I trusted that the Lord would keep me safe and I would be okay. Bravery is being either ignorant or confident or dumb, but courageous is being scared and going through with something. I was the latter, and nervous too. I took the little thing, that was opening it's mouth up. He told me holdings it's neck would relax it. Slowly, I put it my thumb and finger around it, with it squirming, and as I took it's tail, it stopped. It was a quiet moment, other than Mom telling me to look up and smile, Dad taking pictures, everyone giggling and talking to themselves. Justin was behind me. I stroked it's neck a little, and it was actually pretty soft, even though it had the spikes and everything. Very silky, actually. Weird. Well, I gave it back to Justin after a little while, and he showed us if you stroke it's neck for a while it stretches and goes to sleep, no joke. Rebecca touched it, but since she's no daredevil like me, she didn't touch it.(Just Kidding.) But she didn't touch it. I took some pictures of Bob Jr. on the blue front deck where the life jackets were over, and him on it. There still on my phone. So I have touched, held, and stroked a alligator. It's true.

Well, we went to a few other spots and saw some more alligators, and Justin told us some more stuff, as we then made our way back. This is when we learned how Justin was born and raised here, and that he bought a house from his father in law and Aunt and how his grandmother was his neighbor. I think that's really cool. Coming back in the bay, Justin told us to stay buckled and seated until he got it tied to the ropes. On past times, since we couldn't go in reverse, Justin would have to get a paddle and push us out and around. I had not even now finished my pretzels (that's how good of a rationer I am) and my water was not done either. When we were tied up I asked Justin some more questions as we got all our stuff together and got out. We thanked Justin, and gave him a tip, as he was an informational and good boat skills. I needed to go to the restroom, and put some stuff in the jeep as Dad unlocked it. Mom was talking to the old man from New Hampshire when I went to the restroom. Because of both being locked and someone in there, I waited behind the other one, with the cage by me, and then a guy came back. I was by the tools. I went through and went to the restroom, and it was a little worse than the other one, but still good. Then I came back, and the man was gone. Rebecca, Dad and Mom were all in the jeep. And Mom handed me a card.

It read: William Faulkner Jr. and then some other things. I said cool, that that was the guy's name. I was oblivious to the fact of who it was. Mom and Rebecca's eyes widened, thinking that I would jump up and down and say "COOL!" She told me to look closely at the name. "Some famous person?" Mom took the card from me, mad, saying that he was an American Writer and that she thought I would be so excited and think that the guy was the child of the famous writer who died in the 1930's and was a Southern writer, and that I would be freaked out because we were in the south. But I didn't actually know who the guy was, so Mom failed in making me excited.

We drove out of the boondocks,and drove around a little in that area. I was so glad we went to the swamp tour, I got what I wanted, and it was very interesting and cool to see and hold alligators. So glad I went. Well, we still wanted to go to that Cafe Dumont, and so parked in that parking place where we helped out the people with the jumper cable, and parked. I took my phone, excited to go to the recent movie scene location, and to have a good time. I thought maybe I could find Dad a present, but he had earlier said he didn't need a present, and that we were his presents. I wanted to be special for his birthday, but I HAD gotten him a lot for Christmas. Also, my friend's father's friend is the one who organized us having his birthday, so I was kind of responsible for that. But not really. I would be nice to him for the rest of the day and do special favors, but was that enough? It seemed that once people get older they seem less pyched to get presents and harder to purchase for. I would find something for him! But we went down that ramp from the cannon monument, where the extras and the A.D. was yesterday, and I looked at the little tables, all crowded around with other ones, and the green and white awning around a fence. To our right was a weird looking mural.

We went around to where you have to enter, with two boys and a father sitting down on chairs to our left, with some tuba and trombone players outside on the sidewalk, eternally playing. Well, it was less annoying than the clappers of yesterday at the State Museum. We all talked about the swamp tour, and I rubbed in to Rebecca how she didn't hold it. We sat ourselves, among all the people in this little restaurant, and you could not fit a fat man in there, it was very crowded and the tables were so close together. By the right corner of the outside area we sat down, and I could barely could fit myself down there. We sat by a long table with some people there, plus a guy in his thirties who was bearded and had a suit on. He also had a handheld large video camera, and he was holding it up, showing it to the old short haired lady, and the brown haired young kid. I wondered why he was video taping this and who those people were. But my wonderings were put aside as Dad told me to look at a three sided napkin holder that had a menu on it. There was only coffee, bignets, and hot chocolate and milk and like three other things. It amazed me that this restaurant had been around this long and was kept in business by only having this few of things. Then the Asian waitress came to us.

I got hot chocolate and Mom and Dad got coffee, and Rebecca milk. We got a bignet plate. It seemed that everyone in the place, all the servers anyway, were Asian. It must be an Asian owned business, I supposed. We asked our waitress about the movie, but alas, she wasn't there that day. While waiting, I told Mom and Dad that I was going to look at the mural, and went up there, staying kind of close, with my back to the long table of people, trying to see if the young guy was French, because I thought I heard new words and an accent. I didn't care anything about the mural. Rebecca looked too, actually really interested. I couldn't tell if the person was French or not. I wish I could use my French Dictionary a little. As I was fake looking and straining my ears, I saw that our things were brought to our table. That was quick. I came over there as Dad paid. This was different because of them just coming up and we paying right at that moment, and then never coming back. I had a good hot chocolate with marsh mellows, and did it with a spoon and straw. There were the beinees, white powdered bread things on a plate. Rebecca had the one with the most powder. I took one, and it was very hot. I waited for a while, as we talked a little about Dad and how cool he is, and then I took a bite on this thing that everyone had recommended.

It tasted warm and sugary, but really good. I had two of those big things. They were really good. Well, after eating and just chilling, those people left, and I got up and asked one of them, politely, if they were movie people. They said they were video taping an orchestra performance in the Cathedral, and I thanked them as they left. Then Dad went inside to go to the restroom, and we waited. He was gone a long time. I looked around but needed to go to the restroom, and made my way through the maze of tables. Dad came out, around the gate and through the Mural entrance, to be in the open space. I asked him where it was as I went to the restroom, through the covered part, and in the actual restaurant inside, with kitchen on my right and some diner tables. There was a line to these bathrooms on the left, in the hallway of the kitchen people constantly coming through. A guy came out, and I saw Mom and Rebecca were also in the line. I went in, and it was pretty spacious, with a lot of bad words and graffiti though. Then after done, I pulled the door. And then pulled again. And again. It didn't make way. I did not panic, to be cool and collective, for that is what you are supposed to be in that situation. I heard Mom and Rebecca's voices, and called to them. Then I pushed. And pushed. Uh-oh. I gulped.

Even if I was stuck, I had a phone with 50% battery left, books on the iBooks, and a French Dictionary. So I was well off. Oh and a pocketknife. I could survive. I called Mom, and she didn't seem to answer. Then I called Dad, who said he was over on the other street, and to hold on the push. I did, and then stumbled out into the line of men, apologizing for being long. I got mad at Mom and Rebecca for not helping me out, but it was short lived. I went across the street to Dad as Mom and Rebecca went into the Women's room. I crossed it, and then Dad and I sat up against the fence of the yard before the Cathedral. We had been to this part of NO a lot. And then the girls came over. On the street by the sidewalks were people and horses pulling carriages. Rebecca wanted to now go on a carriage ride, and pleaded with Mom and Dad. Two ladies said they didn't have room for four, and then we went down to the left towards the corner restaurant we had eaten at for lunch the day before. Then I saw it. And I am sorry for the gruesome details. A carriage horse, brown in color, having it's bladder spurting out brown and yellow urine, like a fat cylinder stick, as rapid as Niagra Falls, and I said to Dad as we passed by, "SO NOW I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN WHEN YOU SAY 'YOU PEE LIKE A RACE HORSE'!!!" And everybody in New Orleans... heard it.

My whole family laughed, saying I shouldn't of said it out loud. There was a man in a cowboy hat, and asked him if we could fit and what his tour did. "It goes over two miles," he said, "and I will take you around ghostly areas, of personal experience, like last year I had a priest expell a demon there.." And we knew then this wasn't the tour for us. Plus, it wasn't worth all the money to have a 2 mile trot in 30 minutes, in a smelly slow carriage. So we didn't do it. There was a ATM in the restaurant, so Dad and I went in there while Rebecca talked to a guy who was sitting down, painting something on a stand, and had his paintings against the fence. Other weird artists had strange paintings up there too. I saw in there Catherine, who was serving someone. I confronted her on her way back to the kitchen, and we talked about how good Emeril's was. I said in mock disappointment that I had no leftovers for her. Oh well. As Dad got his cash, I said goodbye to Catherine. I don't think I'll see her again. Nice person. Well, as I came back, the artist asked Rebecca to pick one painting and that she could have it. They were cemetery ones with little characters doing Jazz stuff. Rebecca picked a red one, with animated like characters. Maybe Mom will be nice enough to give you a pick of it. Mom went to get the money, but he said no, to shoo, as he said. That was very nice of him, and we thanked him as we went up. His name was Trevor Scott. Pay attention to that name.

We went back to the parking lot, and saw people with dreds, tattoos, and brown stuff. One had a lamp on their head. Mom asked what was going on, and the girl said, "Pale vou france?" Mom smiled and went away. She either was French or didn't want to talk. But we got in the car, and drove home. Some pretty weird people in New Orleans. We went home, and with Dad's wishes, did a number of things, for each person.

Dad: T.V. and email and bills

Rebecca: Barbies, Phone, and playing with dogs

Mom: FaceBook, Blog Editing, Sports Articles

Andrew: Blog, Book.

It was a good time, just relaxing. It was a good day ending. I didn't get Dad a present, no, but he didn't want one, and I had helped out with the dinner, and was nice to him all day, and had gotten him a lot of presents at Christmas, and had no time to get them. I love you Dad, you are such a determined, loving, kind, and wise father Dad. You are the best Dad ever. No one could ever replace you, Dad. I love you.

And so ends the blog post of our last full day in the wonderful city of New Orleans. Goodbye for now.

I know that crocodiles look like their smiling when they have their mouth open, but trust me, if you stick your hand in there and the mouth closes, you won't be smiling. -

Andrew.