So let's talk about New Year's Eve, shall we. The only really interesting part of that day was the eve part, the few hours before the ball dropping. But, I'll manage a few sentences of the day, before the Gould's came over. I blogged and cleaned the house and my room for the Gould's coming, and Dad ordered BBQ and beans and such for our dinner. Mom went to the grocery store and ran other errands, as Rebecca sat and watched T.V. We talked about New Year's Resolutions, talked about the great year of 2011. Well, great for some people and bad for others. Great for us. Anyway, we did some other things of that matter, and I got to really good parts in the Redwall, intent on finishing it as the year's changed. Well, the Gould's arrived at about 5, coming through the back door and saying Happy New Year's. They gave everyone hats, be it having a clock on it like a part hat, streamers, or sparkles. I got sparkles on mine, sadly. Mine was a gold top hat. Thanks for buying those, Mrs. and Mr. Gould. I liked mine, minus the sparkles. We said hello to the kids and adults as they showed us small hats for Rocky and Emma. They let them out and Steven and Betsy put on the fedora looking hats, making a string go under their chins. Rocky looked distraught, and squirmed and other things. He bent down and tried to take it off with his paw, succeeding a few times. Emma was just as reluctant. I told them to stop putting them on, they didn't like it, the dogs didn't. They said it looked cute, and just because it looks cute we have a right to torment the animals?
I urged to stop, and was called mean, and a party pooper. They took their pictures, and did other things to the poor dogs. Their statements were a little narrow minded, saying stuff like, "They Like It!" and "It looks cute!", laughing and giggling and taking more pictures. No animal deserves that kind of treatment. Sure, they only put hats that were tight and uncomfortable on them, but they still shouldn't of done it. Maybe once for a picture or so, but not when the dogs take it off to keep putting it back on, on, on, on! Priorities must be discovered and realized, people. I eventually got them to take it off. And oh was I glad.
As the kids drifted upwards to the den, we decided to try that play thing again, and talked a little about what we were gonna do. I pitched most of the ideas, but most of them got immediately rejected, as they were thinking of something else. Rebecca thought of a creative bright idea, iKids! It was a spin off on iGirls, which was a spin off on iHope, which was a spin off on iCarly. A lot of spin offs. Anyway, it was not really original or creative, but it was a good idea. So we went downstairs in the basement in the T.V. and couch part, and Rebecca got a notepad and pen. It was actually a pretty orderly process. We came up with a lot of crazy ideas, and then narrowed it down to 7. They were:
1. Crazy people.
2. Prissie girls meet Country Man
3. Nerd and Bully
4. Crazy Carolers
5. Rocking Robots
6. New Year's Eve Special
7. Dumb People: Dumb Wars
As Rebecca and Betsy got on crazy costumes for the crazy people skit, I got a pillow, put socks on my hands, and wore two hats, one forward, one backward. I also got a stuffed animal. I put all this in the basement bathroom as Rebecca and Betsy did their hair. I put it on a small table with basket and toilet paper. Then Steven and I went over the introduction, him going to go to the karaoke machine with a suit and introduce every one, talking about the iKids and then introducing them. Rebecca was to spring out of a big tall cylinder blue basket, and Betsy would be behind her in under the desk. They were to jump out and surprise all the parents that would be seated on the couch. Next we would do the prissies and country people, and I would put on brown boots, a plaid green and white shirt, and a cap. The girls would wear dresses and purses, stuff like that for the prissies. For the nerd and bully one, which only included Steven and me, would be him with pants coming up high, glasses and a geeky look on him. He would have a "satchel", full of stuff I would be given, when I interrogated him. I would ask for his lunch money and he would give me all sorts of stuff, ranging from stuff animal cats to a clock. I would throw them all down, saying for one reason or another I didn't want it, like "I hate cats" or "I don't need to tell time." Finally he would give me his lunch money, and I would say, "Well that's what I came for" and push him down or something along those lines. I would wear the leather jacket that I got from Belk on the 26th.
For the Crazy Carolers, everyone was in blankets, for some unknown reason. Perhaps to be like cold people, I don't know. Ask the Gould's. Anyway, I had a black suit and part of a light saber that was broken off, being the conductor. We were to come out and sing for the audience, in a terrible way, off pitch and really loud. Then I would change into a guy at a house who would fall down and faint by the singing. I didn't want to be a singer, as I had talked and partied a lot of days before that. And yelled. So I got out of it. As we prepared and such, we went upstairs in the den again, the lady parents there. We all went up for a while and played a game called road trip, where you move pieces across a board that is the map of the U.S., with lines and dots. You roll a dice that has every letter of the alphabet, and then when you land on a letter you a pull a card out, and then when it says a sentence or five things or so(it varies) that starts with your letter, you try to finish the card before the hourglass goes out. We all had cars, and mine was green. Betsy, Mrs. Gould, Rebecca and I all played. It was fun, and I enjoyed the time with them. We did funny phrases before the timer went up. Rebecca got in third place, Betsy in first, and I in second as the pieces moved across the country. Eventually I got in front of Betsy, as we went along. But then before we could finish the fun game, we were called to dinner.
Once again it was a kitchen buffet. All the BBQ stuff we got on red ceramic plates, and Dad and Mom got people to put them in. Pork, turkey, rolls, baked beans, and hash brown potatoes, and we would have dessert later. The kids sat down first ,and were urged by the adults to eat before it gets cold, but I was told by other people it is polite to wait for everyone to come down. We did say a prayer after everyone got down , and I said it, and it was the usual thing, thank you that we are here with the Gould's, and that we hope it would be a great new year, and that we would stick with our New Year's resolutions. Amen. Then we ate and talked, the adults having good conversations and us having some also. We talked about a movie the Gould's had seen, called Puss in Boots. We also spoke of gas prices, and Dad showed Mr. Gould his Four Laws of Debt Free Prosperity, and his other book called the Game of Work. Mrs. Gould and I had a conversation of what books I've read that Steven might like, and I said he would probably NOT like The Hunger Games, but maybe Redwall and Alex Rider Series. Betsy and Rebecca talked about barbies a little, and they left with Steven after they finished the good meal. I stayed and talked for a while, with the grownups. Am I turning into a grownup? I hope not! Ahhh!
We went back downstairs and prepared for our play, preparing to have only white t shirts for the robot skit, and Steven to have a top hat and cape. For the New Year's Eve Special we would have our normal stuff on, and would roll a exercise ball down the long stairs to the basement, through a hallway, kind of like the dropping of the ball in NYC. The difference is this the ROLLING of the ball. I was to have a bathrobe and top hat, also a golf club as cane. I would be Father Time, and before the ball dropped I would leave, and then come back carrying a baby "that I 'found' by a bathrobe and cane". It was to be awesome. Honestly, we had no plans for Dumb Wars, and our only plan was to wing it. We were ready for the parents to come. I went and told the ladies which were in the den, and then told the men in the dining room. I got my crazy stuff on, and the girls got in their spots, under the desk and in the basket, facing the people on the couches. Then we made everyone sit down, with golf clubs and the Quiet Please sticks in our hands, Steven and I, directing them to where they should sit. The two men, Mr. Gould and Dad, sat in the blue leather large chairs that spin around and recline. We both shut the green curtains that separated the play room and T.V. room, and so we then went back. The show was about to begin.
Steven did his little bit, and said this was our first broadcast, and that our friend Ribby (spinoff of Gibby, from iCarly) was video taping it. He said his name was Max, and that the other guy was named Charlie. He told me to come down, but I did not and stayed on the stairs, where I had gone to before they had come down, and put on my costume. I showed my stuffed animal, refusing to show my face. He said Stephanie (Rebecca) and Sara (Betsy) were the girls. At that point they came out, making the grownups very surprised, and bursts of laughs and other things were presented. I came down as "Max" sat out, and we did the crazy people skit. It was about one of them, Rebecca, winning the lottery. She had pens in her hair and the slinky in there also, around a water bottle. It looked really weird. We argued and fought on what we should spend it on, a boat, car, a giant giraffe named Bob, whatever. But then I realized at the bottom of the lottery sheet it said "APRIL FOOLS!" and I spread this info to the other crazy's. We all went away, sad. Betsy said she wanted to cut our heads off. "HAHAHAHAHAHA!" was her laugh as she took a braves tomohak and had at us. It eventually finished though.
The Prissie girls were coming in from New York, because their dad made them come down south for a family reunion. I was their uncle, and had a bass in my hand, and made them milk a cow, shoot, fish, and showed them my boots, giving them fried food. It was fun to poke fun at rednecks, like singing "Sweet Home Alabama" and using a country accent. There was a lot of laughs from the audience on that one, apart from being creeped out and speechless from the crazy one. And then it ended with me taking them on the plane back to New York City. The funny thing is, at the end they started talking in a country accent, and they held their hands to their lips in surprise. It was funny.
Steven was a laugh out loud nerd, and acted scared as I approached him as the bully, moving from right to left with a hoody and leather jacket. I was the traditonal bully, mean and dumb. I took his twenty dollars at the end, real twenty dollars. I had either thrown or knocked down all the books, toys, and weird random things he gave me in place of his lunch money. But I got it eventually. I would give it back to him later, as it was his real money. Crazy carolers was loud, as I conducted them and then fainted as the guy who owned the apartment they were singing at. The Christmas Classics "Joy to the World" and "We wish you a merry Christmas" sounded like a monkey being squeezed in the clamp of a crane, or a scream in a scary house, projected on megaphones turned worse by an auto tuner, then blended with Rebecca Black's voice and Darth Vader. It was fun. But it got a little out of hand, and we had to stop it eventually. Steven was the creator of the robots, everyone else being a robot. He had designed for us to dance and sing, but we just walked around and did bad moves. The funny thing was, we had thought we would actually dance well, but Steven thought it was terrible and so the play made it seem we were doing what was not expected of us. He tried to shut us down, saying "Control Alt Delete!" a lot of times over. We shut down but kept getting overrided and came back up, falling down and taking clubs and destroying our creator. We did "Karate Chop, Karate Chop!" and made him fall down. It was a funny end to the skit.
Between the skits we talked and asked the audience at intervals which they liked best, as the girls dressed or were not ready we stalled, or called for an intermission. The guys liked the Prissie one and the nerd one, and the ladies liked the crazy carolers pretty well, although it was a little loud. So now we put on our normal regular clothes, and talked about the year and shared our New Year's resolutions. Then I came and sat with the audience, explaining that, in an old man's voice, "I am an old man, and have grown from a baby in January to being an old man in December. I am Father Time, and go from baby to old man every year, I mean, it is nauseating, and so strenuous, not having one year to get one year older, I have to get like 90 years old in one year! I have seen many things, and know everything about every year I've been doing this, except when I turn to baby I forget it, and know only of the year I had just done, then I forget it again. I know it's very complicated, none of you understand it, only I do. Anyway (as I stood up in a slow manner) I need to go. I'm gonna be a baby again, yet again." I then waddled away, as everyone said the ball was about to come down. Steven was at the top, holding it. The little soccer ball went down, signifying only ten seconds left. 10, 9 (parents counting with us) 8,7,(kids at foot, out of way) 6,5, 4 (really excited, looking at it) 3, 2, 1!
And then it dropped. It bounced up and down the stairs, and went all the way down. I came around with a fake baby in my arms, a toy, saying I just found it by a robe. It was Baby 2012. And such a cute baby it is. It's 11 days old now. Well, we tried out the dumb wars, having dumb people fight each other with golf clubs, light sabers and pillows, but the parents were afraid of people getting hurt, and everyone was tired, and the men had gone upstairs, so we stopped. It was about 11:15, and the guys had gone to get beer. We put on the NYC recording of New Year's Eve, and saw all the glitter, lights, and people in Times Square. Ryan Secrest talked about all the people there as Lady Gaga did a creepy performance, becoming a ball and other things. Dick Clark did one minute to two minute little shorts, and it was crazy how old he was and now young he looked. It was crazy he has done that for forty years. He does short paragraphs, and only talks about how big and how many people there are, not even summing up what had happened in 2011. Anyway, we waited and waited for the end of the day, to a new year full of hope and fun. We were ancy, but also tired. I read dreamily the Redwall book, my head and nose terrible, my ears throbbing, and my stomach a little bad. Then the worst happened. Noise makers and thundercrackers were handed out to the kids. So much loudness, and noise. Sounds went around my ears as my headache increased, vibrations, shouts and hoots, and other stuff. AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Then on T.V., as we all relaxed and talked, Dick Clark did the countdown minute. Images in replay went through my mind, as I thought of national, global, as well as personal, things that happened that year. The deaths of three bad guys, our national deficit and Hurricane Irene, as well as my last year of elementary school and the first half of a trip around the nation. 30 seconds left. I looked around me, seeing these were pretty nice people to be spending the last day of 2011 and the first day of 2012 with. I thought of resolutions, and hope for the new year. 15 seconds. From hence we started counting down, all together. Sick as I was, I still counted down as I had only a paragraph left in Redwall. 5, 4, 3, 2, (it was about to be a new year) 1! The real ball, the blue one in NYC, was dropped by Mayor Bloomberg and Lady Gaga pushing down on a button. I'm sure you saw it as it whirled down to the streets of New York. I kissed Mom as my parents and the Gould's did so to their spouses. Then Mrs. Gould kissed me. Gross. J/K. The kids all went outside and...well, that's a different day, I suppose. Ha, I can't speak about it because it's a different day. I guess you'll have to read the next blog post to find out what happened on January 1st, 2012. Blog you then!
iKids, iGirls, iHope, iCarly, so many i names!,
Andrew.
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